Overcoming stress and learning to manage it properly...

So it's been about two weeks again since I last wrote. I've been working on the condo, getting some early spring cleaning done, and preparing for my next 12 credit hours worth of classes to start (since I was already enrolled in one 4 credit hour class that started in January). Lately I've been very stressed out. I think it has been a huge combination of dealing with the anniversary of my grandmother's passing, dealing with the fact that my home is not always PERFECTLY neat and orderly, dealing with the anticipation of being enrolled in 16 credit hours this semester when the minimum for full time is 12, and maybe a hint of PMDD and the fact that I have a nearly two-year-old running around (where the hell did THOSE two years go???).

In all I have been very on edge lately; easily aggravated, angry a LOT, easily saddened, and emotionally drained basically. The thing about it all is, I could not for the life of me figure out why I kept getting so angry and frustrated with the smallest things in the world (i.e. the fact that I couldn't open a juice container, the fact that I couldn't get a drywall anchor into the wall of the closet, etc.) and upset and ashamed over what seemed like nothing (i.e. the fact that the inside of my car was filthy after months of driving around in Chicago winter weather, a toddler throwing and spilling food all over the backseat, and a massive fur-ball of a dog I call a pet riding in the front seat and shitting on my hat!).

My lovely cousin recommended about this time last year that I read Melody Beattie's Codependent No More in order to learn to let go of the little things that I have no real control over. I learned a hell of a lot about how to deal with my relationships with others, and how not to let their baggage get me down. However, I apparently did not learn much about how to deal with my relationship with MYSELF. So I've decided I need some form of an outlet, and some way to relax regularly and manage my stress level appropriately.

My BEAUTIFUL cousin/MOH and me on my wedding day. Oh! and the Hubby...

My same lovely cousin practices Buddhism (sofar as I am aware), and has recently learned Reiki (which I am THOROUGHLY interested in and excited about learning more about from her awesome ass!) On my wedding day, we were waiting in the bathroom/locker room/ lounge area of the wedding hall a few minutes before the ceremony began, and my chest turned bright pink with nerves (my mother and I, and many of the other crazy women on my maternal grandmother's side turn bright pink or red when they are nervous, infuriated, or stressed)... I... was stressed and NERVOUS! My lovely MOH/cousin came to me and said (and I paraphrase) "do me a favor, and take some very deep breathes with me, it will help with the pink in your chest" (btw, I love her for being such an awesome MOH throughout the entire day, I don't know anyone else who would have thought about calming a brides nerves enough to clear the pink in her skin so that it doesn't show in pictures!). And what would you know, it worked! There was no sign of pink or nerves in any of the photos, and it was cleared within about two minutes before I walked down the aisle!

So after speaking to my lovely guru crazy cousin whom I love about my INSANE stress levels, I have decided to learn some meditation, and have taken advantage of my lovely Silent E's interest in wanting to learn yoga as I have wanted to for some time.

Goals for mediation and yoga: Learn to manage my stress appropriately rather than lashing out, holding feelings in,
or becoming overwhelmingly upset and angry; to become more at peace with myself, my life, and its circumstances; to
become more aptly able to deal with the roller coaster of life efficiently and effectively.

Here is the website I have started with my meditations, I plan to do some research and purchase a recommended book that will help guide me further. http://www.how-to-meditate.org/why-learn-to-meditate.htm/

Also, here is the website for The Yoga Boutique which is where Silent E and I will be beginning our awesome yoga experience together! http://www.theyogaboutiquechicago.com/

Also, an update on my search for personal care products that are green, natural, and SAFE: I started with the Burt's Bees brand, since I already had some Baby Bee shampoo/bathwash for my little one. So far, I am pleased with the Baby Bee line, as I have been using the Baby Bee Tear Free Shampoo & Wash, and the Baby Bee Original Nourishing Lotion on my little peanut. It smells good, doesn't hurt her eyes, and moisturizes well. Best of all, there's not Phthalates, parabens, or petrochemicals, and it's hypo-allergenic!

I have also been using Burt's Bees More Moisture Shampoo and Conditioner with Brazil Nut and Pomegranate, which I must say I am not very pleased with. It has a very bitter, almost pukey smell to it, and the shampoo tangles my hair and makes it stick together during wash. The conditioner works well, but it still has that icky smell to it. I also decided to use the Burt's Bees Radiance Exfoliating Body Wash with royal Jelly and Jojoba beads, along with the Radiance Body lotion with royal jelly. I must say, I'm not very pleased with either one. The Body wash is OK, it doesn't smell bad, but it doesn't exfoliate as well as I would like it too and it's pretty watery. The lotion I'm not very pleased with at all, as it is also very watery, and doesn't moisturize as much as I need it to. It also has a funny smell to it which reminds me of a snack my mom used to make around Christmas time (oyster crackers baked with some particular herbs and seasonings... not something you want to smell like). Also, the lotion contains natural mica which is "to enhance skin tone". However, although I do not mind a hint of sparkle on my skin, it took nearly three showers without using any of the Burt's Bees lotion or body wash to get the mica off of my skin... gross! Overall I must say, I am pleased with the Baby  Bee line, however, I could definitely do without the More Moisture line of hair cleansing products and the Radiance skin care line. But I won't give up on Burt's Bees yet, as soon as I'm through with my stinky purchases, I will replenish with yet another shot at Burt's Bees line, as there are many more options to choose from!

By the way... song of the day today is Darius Rucker's "This". The lyrics say it all...